Constantine – not a bad movie!

I just saw Constantine and I must admit that I really enjoyed it. I never read hellblazer so I was spared the “what the fuck did they do to my favorite comic book?” feeling. So I could judge this movie for what it was, and not for what it should be. The truth is that the movies based on comic books never live up to the originals. Let’s count them down, shall we:

Both Spiderman flicks sucked immensely. Spider man was smart, witty and talkative. Tobey Maguire comes of as borderline retarded, brooding, mute. Wtf?

Daredevil also sucked. Ben Affleck totally destroyed a story that was very dear to my heart. DD was one of my favorite childhood superheros, and holywood just threw away everything that was cool about him and produced yet another super hero pulp.

Xmen movies were digestible for the most part. But what did they do to my beautiful, strong, independent, complicated and conflicted rogue? They turned her into a ditzy teenager. Geez!

From all the superhero movies made recently, I enjoyed only Hellboy and now Constantine. Why? Because I did not read the original books. Hence, I started with low expectations and was pleasantly surprised by both pictures. On the other hand I’m pretty sure that fans of Hellboy and Hellblazer hate these two films with passion.

I watched Constantine with no expectations whatsoever. After all, how good can a movie with Keanu Reves killing daemons be? Apparently not all that bad. Don’t get me wrong though – Keanu still can’t act for shit.

I find it amazing that someone who has been in this business as long as him, never picked up even a shred of acting skill. To give him credit – he can sorta emote. He can look semi-brooding, or semi-pissed off. He has the asshole look down pat, because it seems to be his usual mode of operation. This movie pretty much required him to alternate between these three – so he was doing ok for the most part.

And besides – I did watch all 3 matrix movies. After that much exposure to Keanu’s lack of acting ability I barely seem to notice anymore. The rest of the cast seems to be able to route around Keanu, and pick up the slack when needed. So on average, the acting is pretty decent.

The movie starts really strong, but then kindoff looses it’s momentum down the road. Still, it is interesting, and gripping up till the last scenes. Ending is predictable, but not totally obvious. Ok, I’m lying. In retrospection, it is totally obvious, but I must say I have seen worse.

The concept for the main character is very intriguing – Constantine will go to hell, because he attempted suicide in the past. He also has terminal lung cancer which will kill him in few months – which does not stop him from smoking in every single scene. Fighting demons is not a noble calling for him – he simply is trying to buy his way back into heaven. But of course this stuff was taken from the comic book.

Unfortunately, the ending is very disappointing as all this conflict, and tragedy is removed from his life. The gum chewing scene sucked… It would be much better if they had him lite a smoke in the final act. But oh well… Holywood needs to have it’s happy endings.

I would recommend it, but only if you never read the Hellblazer series.

~ I just noticed that the pic I posted here is in French. Sorry… Blame Google images 😛


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